Monday, April 19, 2010
third post! anghong EAT YOUR WORDS! haha.
i cant wait for tmr tmr tmr. i hope my 300++ pages of notes won't kill me (or my mind, more likely) under its weight. please please please cross your fingers! but then. who cares what happens in consti. after that. SUMMER IS HEREEEEEE!
the wait has never been so long, and so painful. SUMMER SUMMER SUMMER MY DEAREST, HAPPIEST, BESTEST, LOVE!
so what will happen tmr? who knows? maybe the sky will fall on our heads. maybe we'll go back to being how we were. or maybe we'll become something different. its been a long time. but only one thing's for sure. hope always, always, springs eternal.
But only love can say - try again or walk away But i believe for you and me The sun will shine one day So i just play my part Pray you'll have a change of heart But i can't make you see it through That's something only love can do the emo songs and 3 posts in 2 weeks lol IF I START POSTING 5 TIMES A DAY, PLEASE KNOCK ME ON THE HEAD WITH A VERY, VERY, VERY HARD OBJECT
a star fell from the sky;
1:42 PM
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
i dont think ive blogged so often in years. haha maybe it was a good habit to have. or maybe its a sign of emo-ness LOL.
i donch like this. i'm trying to make a decision but its hard. and you know me, i can never quite make up my mind. unless its on sale and the only piece left :p
so, to do or not to do? to say or not to say?
i have a terrible habit. when i wanto escape a difficult decision, i do something that will make the decision for me. like, if im not sure if i wanto go somewhere, i procrastinate till its too late to go and then hey! i dont have to decide anymore. as if somehow that makes it all not my fault anymore. what an idiot i can be.
please, please, please don't let it come to that.
a star fell from the sky;
5:47 PM
Friday, April 09, 2010
my dear friends. i have just had an epiphany that i must share with all the, erm, 5 readers of my blog.
there are only 2 types of guys in this world: the type who'll be nice to you, and the type whom you'll be nice to.
and you must be careful, because it can be hard to differentiate the two types. i'm not talking about guys who'll be nice to you in a superficial way, like letting you choose all the time, being patient while you shop, offering to hold your things for you, etc etc. anyone can do that. but when it comes down to the crunch, when its between your interests and his, whose interests will he choose?
the nice guys will of course pick yours and sacrifice their own. the other type will naturally pick theirs and sacrifice yours, and possibly give you some bullshit excuse justifying their behaviour (ie its for both our good).
and women, being the unfathomable and irrational creatures that we are, never fail to choose the second type, the one that'll bring us maximum pain and tears. i've thought about it, and thought about it, and thought about it somemore, and i've come up with 3 reasons why we pick the path most rocky when it comes to matters of the heart.
(1) Maybe we just like hurting ourselves.
(2) Maybe we enjoy chasing the uncatchable.
(3) Maybe we have a hero complex that convinces us that we need to rescue these types of people from themselves. little do we know that in the end, we'll be the ones that need rescuing from them.
I do believe that its always a mix of all three. there's an allure of being the one to 'tame' the one who cannot be tamed, there's a mix of being bored by predictable niceness and the lack of an emotional rollercoaster ride, and of course, there's the bad boy that never fails to steal your heart.
how do you differentiate the nice guys from the ones you'll be nice to?
when its too late of course. when you've gotten burnt, when you finally bring yourself to look beneath the bullshit excuses, when you finally remove the rose-tinted glasses, stop kidding yourself that he'll change, and see what you chose for what it really is. in other words, when reality doesn't allow you to look away and hope for change anymore.
its really really really hard to tell which type of guys the guys you meet are. but trust me, they can all be divided neatly into either 2 categories. there are no in-betweens. you can try to observe their interactions with other people, their relationships with their parents, their dads - i noticed sons tend to mimic their dad's behavioural traits. if the dad is unbelievably selfish, what are the chances his son will have the heart of Mother Teresa? no matter how unlikely it seems, most men really are just a chip off the old block.
most imptly, do not be too quick to judge. he may seem like a real bad boy, but you may be surprised when things come to shove. similarly, he may seem like the model son and all, but you might be in for a terrible shock when you realize that your interests just don't occur to him at all.
but we must must must be careful when classifying, because we will pay the price of a wrong classification. needless to say, that price is endless tears, heartache, disappointment, and a very difficult decision to make in the end.
in the end, its the ones who are nice to us, and ourselves, who get it rough. we realize that there is a reason why some people are called 'untamable', there's a reason why we were attracted in the first place, there's definitely fire beneath all that smoke, and its the fire that burns people who get too close.
if you've picked a good one, hold on to him tight - they're rarer than good diamonds. but what do you do then, if you've picked a difficult one?
no one knows. you continue trying. you give up. you resign yourself to a love that hurts. or you resign yourself to a love that's just fine, not fantastic, and give up those childhood dreams of a prince charming.
one thing's for sure - just as a leopard never changes its spots, don't ever, ever expect your chosen one to change. that road leads to nowhere.
just open your eyes wider, think harder, and pick a better one next time :p
good luck! =D
a star fell from the sky;
5:55 PM
Monday, March 15, 2010
To my dearest Jovena.Happy Birthday! You're 21! I hope you have a super fantastic and memorable 21st :)
Although you're 21 now, to me we'll always be 15 and in pinafores, in the stuffy 3rd-floor corner classroom, mucking around and complaining about work and teachers. We may drive to meet each other now, wear pretty clothes when we see each other and have funny coloured hair, but it always seems unreal to me. I keep expecting that one day we'll wake up and be back in our trusty darkblue pinafore, sweating in class, emo-ing about school and wondering where life will take us. My heart has definitely not caught up with my head.
It seems almost surreal that we've left those days behind us for good, for 5 years now. It still seems strange to see everyone in their pretty clothes, with the image of them in pinafores and blouses still so vividly etched in my mind. My heart still expects us to go back to dark mornings and sweaty family dance assemblies, recess and orange bowl and toast, and the healthy old days of morning jog :p
These almost unbelievable 6 years have passed, we've seen batch after batch graduate and left our roots (and my heart) behind with them. Throughout this time, I'm tremendously glad to have always had you by my side, comforting me when I need comfort and letting me be when need be. I doubt anyone else knows my moods as well as you do (must be courtesy of our time sitting together as emo kids :p).
Today, the day that you officially become an adult and leave those teenage years behind, I hope you look forward to the future with hope and joy but still keep those long-ago memories close to your heart. Never fear the future, for you have us by your side :) Cheers!
Love always and always,
Mingyee.
a star fell from the sky;
11:42 PM
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
my malaysia trip was quite an experience. although we didnt do much that we've never done before, the change of environment was good. and i drove in malaysia for the first time ever! haha first time ever i drove at 120 km/h also, that was quite scary :p we spent 2 days in some resort in malacca. it was a huge place, the only way to get around is by driving. seriously, if you tried to walk you might walk yourself to death. it basically comprises some theme parks (like escape, big splash, that kinda thing) and some recreational stuff. so we paintballed (targets, not people), went go-karting and horse-riding, and visited some of the theme parks. the highlight (for me) was our fishing trip! well it is a fishing pond but! we caught something. my friend marcus tells me its a peacock bass. it is pretty tho, and the first fish ive caught, ever. i was pretty freaked out when i reeled the line in and saw the fish on it. i yelled and thrust the fishing rod at my mom and ran away. not my proudest moment, but in my defence it was a big shock seeing a real fish on the line after mostly 2 hours of getting my bait eaten by conniving fish and reeling back an empty hook. after much tussling and screaming, we managed to release the hook a little, so when we dropped the fish back into the pond (to prevent it from dying) it managed to swim away itself. that was a relief, we were starting to panick about causing an innocent fish to die so painfully in our hands. we hadn't actually thought about what to do if we actually caught something. (such faith in our fishing skills :p)
i have to say the resort was pretty impressive. animal-wise. lol i mean like they have many animals which you can really get up close to, because the animals are walking around all the time. like the elephants let you ride on them, the horses are at the horse riding area, the tiger is always lying somewhere for pictures. im serious, they have a real tiger. and we stood right behind him for a picture lol. first time ive ever been so close to a tiger :p the first time i saw it i actually thought it was a fake. because he looked so perfect! his coat was all glossy and shiny and his eyes were omg scaryy. and he was so still i thought it was a fake. but hes prob just sedated :p anyway at night all the animals have to perform in this animal parade where they basically walk and do tricks. i felt kinda sad for the animals coz they life looks like it sucks :p they have to be up really early to do all the rides and everything and at night they still have to perform. if they were human and working im pretty sure they'd be raking in some big money, for all that time they spend working and being subject to rough trainers and keepers.
in the resort we stayed in a 'villa' which is essentially just a small bungalow. it was very comfortable tho. we even had our own 'pool' which looked like a really big tub to me. but it had clean water, so nothing to complain about. so while the more adventurous members of my family ventured out to explore the theme parks, the rest of us stayed in the pool and sunned ourselves :p i came back with a pretty impressive tan!
after 2 days of resort-living we ventured out to the big city! haha we took a 4 hour drive to KL. i literally felt like i was returning to civilization. at the resort, you have to drive 20 mins to get to the nearest town (which is very small btw!) to get sth to eat. otherwise, you can eat bad food at the expensive restaurants in the resort. being in the hotel in KL with restaurants at your doorstep was like coming to a pool of water after being in a scorching desert :p and shops, the glorious shops. there literally was NOTHING to buy in the resort. seriously. you might find a souvenir store if you are lucky and drive long enough. so when i talk about a change in environment, i have to say it really is quite a drastic change in environment. i didnt even realize that going to KL was like going back to singapore, i was too preoccupied being overwhelmed by the sight of proper buildings and shops and signboards that are not telling you that its 20km to the nearest town.
we stayed in a hotel connected to a mega big shopping centre, so KL was all shop, shop, shop and eat, eat eat. for all the shopping we did, i didnt buy much. but i did get a pair of awesome jeans =DDDD and the hotel was really comfortable. and they had a lounge where there's always food :p tea time snacks in the afternoon and cocktail hour and finger food at night. and all free =D even the alcohol and internet service. so we did spend quite some time there. i was glad to be back though. even though theres no room service bringing you all manner of things at all times of the day, and free food anytime you want, theres truly no place like home.
since we've been back, ive been mostly slacking out, watching movies i missed during the school term, and actually reading for leisure rather than out of need and stress. while thats all been enjoyable, ive decided that the next holiday i have, i am going to keep myself busy. i think its better for both mind and body :p
to end off, christmas is here once again, so to everyone, have a very very merry christmas and an awesome new year :) make the most of whats left of the holidays!
a star fell from the sky;
10:11 PM
Friday, December 11, 2009
is it that in life you dont always get everything you want, or is it just you and me that doesn't give me everything i want?
im tired. its been far too long, and i dont wanto waste anymore time.
im terribly scared of waking up one morning at 43 and realizing i should have walked when i could.
where do we go now?
a star fell from the sky;
9:54 PM
Saturday, December 05, 2009
my last post said november is here lol. well, the end of 2009 is officially here now! its december. 2009 feels like its flown by lol. the sems get shorter and shorter (not literally), the holidays fly by faster and faster. and we. are officially. getting. OLD. lol i only realized how old we are when i realized we're older then ALL the contestants on singapore idol. i still rmbr a time when we were so young we automatically assumed that everyone was older than us. but thats not true anymore. all those 17 year olds make me jealous :p and of course, another reminder is when you accumulate so many memories, with so many people, at so many places, that sometimes you cant keep track of them anymore. when you see someone on the street and actually have to stop and think where and how you know this person (once of course, you've actually figured out who this person is :p). can you imagine what we'll be saying at 40?! lol.
but no, i wld not want to go back to when i was 17. sure, it was a great year, but being 20 is so much more fun =D thanks to all my wonderfully sweet friends, their best wishes and the cakes and presents! many thanks especially to my most dearest joanne and jovena for their very pretty cake and present (as always!), stevie for the sweet card and present, my awesome sisters for their cute presents, the dennings for the cake and twister night, everyone for their best wishes, and of course my dearest, for a great time =D
so, the rest of december. much slacking, much sex and the city, and much fun =D lets go and make the most of whats left of 2009 =D
love, remind me.
a star fell from the sky;
10:24 AM
